Everything's Funny To Someone.
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Thursday, July 28, 2005 Moby's Freakin' Brilliant I'm not in the know about Eminem's ongoing feud with Moby, except that in the one Mr. Nem song I have in iTunes, he "disses" Mr. Moby (why they're cat fighting, I've no idea). He also called him a girl at the 2002 Video Music Awards, apparently. In response, Moby takes the high road by praising Eminem for his latest anti-war / anti-Bush song, saying he has a newfound respect for him. Moby also, and here's the brilliant part, said that being mentioned by Eminem in a song, and by having Eminem dress up like him in the video, was "some of the best publicity [he's] ever had." Bet you anything Eminem stays away from further "dissing" of Moby from now on. posted by ben | 8:20 AM | (0) comments Tuesday, July 26, 2005 Decode This confusing string of words was at the bottom of a spam I recently received: creosote shaky corruption diego contributor adventurous herpes wristwatch conant weinstein d's bitch cordite adept diabetes gyrate decaffeinate emeriti pigeonberry hovel irrigate lax covet heliocentric funk saran butt preeminent disulfide frog anticipatory catherwood bratwurst confucius cantaloupe einsteinium memo rooseveltian clearwater coup infertile deferrable tarantula burke seeing boeotia atheist require gusto thresh paregoric yeager bogota paperback I've been staring at it now for about an hour, trying to figure out what it means. If anyone can break this code, I'll be grateful. I'm thinking of putting it in a song. posted by ben | 2:54 PM | (0) comments If I were an Onion headline writer... Oldest Man To Climb Rainier Breaks Own Record, Hip posted by ben | 2:50 PM | (0) comments More from the imdb.com I've been restraining myself from reposting interesting or funny tidbits I've read on the imdb lately, but this one made me snort my coffee. The rock documentary Metallica: Some Kind of Monster is about the heavy metal band's torturous journey through recording a new album while simultaneously going through group therapy to learn how to be good people, as well as being good musicians and rock stars. On the bottom of the page, if you like this title, the imdb also recommends Airheads. Ha! posted by ben | 11:36 AM | (0) comments Wednesday, July 20, 2005 There Aren't Enough Crickets I'm part of the Font Makers' union. If we don't get our way, we're going on strikethrough! posted by ben | 11:54 AM | (0) comments Monday, July 18, 2005 The Latest Blow San Diego's acting mayor was convicted of taking cash bribes from a strip club owner to repeal the city's "no touching" ordinance. Michael Zucchet, who became interim mayor over the weekend, was found guilty of conspiracy, extortion and fraud on his first business day in office. He will almost certainly have to resign. I think he wins the "all time bad first day on the job" award. posted by ben | 12:59 PM | (0) comments Friday, July 15, 2005 Overheard: "...so then this obnoxious little pipsqueak started mouthing off to me. I wasn't thinking, I'd had a couple drinks, so I just hauled off and punched the guy square in the nose. He stumbled back and yelped in pain as my friends grab me and we move to the door. I don't know if the police were called, but we figured we'd be better safe than sorry. As we made our way out, he screamed 'I'm gonna have you kicked out of here! Don't you know who my daddy is?' I yelled back, 'I don't give a fuck who your daddy is!' This seemed to irritate him, which I remember enjoying. See, back in those days at Yale, everyone's 'daddy' was somebody, you know? "Come to find out later that this little pipsqueak was George W. Bush. If only I'd have known..." posted by ben | 9:44 AM | (0) comments Wednesday, July 13, 2005 If I Were A Centerfold Likes: Finding a bag of gummi bears in my cupboard I forgot I had. Dislikes: People who blame software for their own incompetencies. posted by ben | 1:24 PM | (0) comments Colonel Clink I've refused to let myself feel guilty or intimidated, no matter what people think - which is a big step for me. I'm referring to work's coffee fund. If I worked for a small company, I would gladly contribute. I drink a lot of coffee. However, I work for a rather large company - and on top of all of that I'm not receiving any benefits. No medical or dental or paid leave for me. So I'm taking the coffee as a benefit. Lady from AP, you can jingle your quarters as much as you want, clink them into the coffee fund jar as loudly as you can, and even vocalize what you're doing while I'm pumping coffee into my mug for the fifth time this morning. You can do all this - I'm not paying. Deal with it. posted by ben | 9:38 AM | (0) comments Bustin' up a Starbux Vancouver, WA mayor Royce E. Pollard smashes coffee mugs in a Starbucks. Is he angry over CEO Howard Shultz's comments concerning Palestine's role in mid-east aggression? Is he trying to promote more organic fair trade policies? Is it because he hates Sheryl Crow? No. He smashed them because they were collectors mugs for Portland. You see, Vancouver's got a bit of an inferiority complex concerning their larger neighbor to the south, and so the mayor pulled a Jack Nicholson to get his city a little more respect. Welcome to Vancouver vs. Portland, round 1. Let the games begin. posted by ben | 8:22 AM | (0) comments Tuesday, July 12, 2005 Tape This Job and Shove It The Space Shuttle Discovery was damaged on the launchpad today when a window cover fell off and struck insulating tiles near the tail. No workers were nearby when the window cover fell off and dropped about 60 feet, the space agency said. It was not immediately clear why the cover — which was held by tape — came loose. Oh, I don't know, perhaps it fell off because it was held on by tape. "It is utterly crucial for NASA, for the nation, for our space program to fly a safe mission," NASA Administrator Michael Griffin said on the eve of the launch. "We have done everything that we know to do." I can understand. I sometimes use tape to hold things onto my car, too. I'm no rocket scientist, but these people are! And they're dealing with rockets! posted by ben | 4:14 PM | (0) comments Disfonting One of these days I'm going to figure out why the font changed. posted by ben | 10:35 AM | (0) comments Guythink Supervisor: Good morning, Ben's co-worker. Nice hair cut. Ben's co-worker: Thanks. Ben didn't notice. me: It's not that I didn't notice. I just don't care. posted by ben | 10:33 AM | (0) comments |
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